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(This article was printed in The Argus, Friday January 26th 2001)
Breathe easier thanks to Pat's birth days....
ASK any new mum whether she fancies going through the process of giving birth again and you might get a brusque reply. But dozens of people do choose to relive their experience of being born. It is all part of a rapidly-growing therapy aimed at healing the wounds left by one of life's most traumatic experiences. SALLY HALL reports:
Just after we are born, the first thing most of us do is bawl our eyes out. It is a way of showing we are alive. But it is not always so easy to show our feelings. Many find it a struggle to stay cheerful and optimistic, and keep pain and frustration bottled up.
For some, the solution is counselling, for others it might be feng-shui or hypnotherapy. But one woman believes the only way to solve these feelings is to go right back to the beginning of life itself.
Pat Bennaceur has been practising breathwork techniques for eight years. Breathwork is a way of regressing back to the moment of birth. She claims it uncovers subconscious memories of being born, explores the pain and trauma of the experience and opens up the mind for new ideas.
Pat, of the Drive, Hove, takes her clients back to the moment they emerged from the womb through specialised breathing techniques. She believes people's experience of their own birth can have a profound effect on their attitude to life. She said: "Although the people who come to see me are experiencing difficulties now, we will concentrate on working around their experience of birth."
"People probably know more about their birth than they think. They might not always consciously remember it. Often the more traumatic the birth, the less you will remember consciously. Often after a session they will talk about it with their mum who will say: 'How on earth do you know that?' We can end up uncovering things that for no bad reason have been left unsaid."
Pat believes that if someone's birth has involved a lot of fear and trauma, it can hold them back for life - unless they work through those deeply buried, long-forgotten feelings.
Certainly Hilary Lovelace, a district nurse from Midhurst, has found the experience of reliving her birth an enormously positive one. She said: "I have had flashbacks about my birth since I have been doing breathwork."
"I had what you might call a normal childhood, but my birth was horrendous. It was an induced birth and I came out after just two hours. Obviously, in some fundamental way, that is very traumatic for a baby being forced out with such speed before you are ready. I was born in the fifties when hospital births were very clinical and didn't take into account the feelings of the mother or the baby. I was taken away from my mother for hours and fed to a strict rota. When I first told my mum about what I was doing I could feel her heckles rise. But now she realises there's no blame in all of this. It has definitely brought us closer together."
Pat's breathing techniques are also aimed not just at overthrowing immobilising fears. According to Hilary: "When you are breathing with Pat, there are real chemical changes in the body. Not only do you realise why you are having these negative feelings, the breathing flushes them out."
Another client, Philip MiIburn, believes breathwork has completely changed his life. For him, the experience is less about reliving his birth than using the breathing to help him focus on issues in his life today. "Breathwork is very much about a bombardment of positive thoughts on whatever you are trying to deal with in life", he said. "I have been able to believe in myself more since I have been doing it."
"I was sent to boarding school when I was ten and to survive that I had to close down my feelings completely. I still find it very hard to cry."
"I am not into it because I think birth is the most important event in my life, I am into the positive affirmations and the breathing. It's a really safe place to get into my feelings and allow the tears to come out. The breathing helps me to let my feelings out and then it helps me deal with them."
Pat also uses breathing to help pregnant women have a positive, fear-free labour. The theories behind breathwork also apply to the process of giving birth. Pat teaches 'ecstatic birthing', where she takes a mum-to-be and her partner through the breathing techniques and positive thinking of breathwork. She will work with the couple in the weeks before the baby is born and then help the woman through the birth itself.
The technique she uses, called the conscious connected breath, involves taking deep, rhythmical, calm breaths. It is a common misconception that breathwork involves panting or hyperventilation, but according to Pat if that is the case it is not being done properly. "Hyperventilating comes from panic. Clients will sometimes succumb to that because working through their fears and trauma can be very frightening. It is my job as a rebirther to support and calm them."
But the conscious, connected breath does bring about physical and psychological changes in her clients. She said: "You do become very receptive. You come back to a place of surrender, as if you were a baby. You then bring in all these positive thoughts: 'Life is easy, there is time enough for everything you want to do.' It can be quite hypnotic."
When Pat is working with her clients, she covers them with a duvet to keep them warm and stays by their side throughout.
Wet breathwork sessions can also take place in hot-tubs where the experience of emerging from the womb can be more accurately represented.
Pat, 46, who has a ten year old son, Karim, never criticises the mothers for the traumatic birth experiences her clients have had. "We know that every woman giving birth is doing the best she can. If I knew then what I know now, I would have given birth to my son differently, but there should be no question of blame. None of this is about blame, it's about forgiveness. "
Anyone interested in the idea of breathwork can contact Pat Bennaceur on 01273-727588. |
